So why am I breaking today? The shards of past pains are stabbing at my heart today. I haven't felt like this in soooo long.
I slept very well last night. I took a Zantac for the acid reflux and heartburn. It worked like a charm. I also took a Tylenol 3 so I could get some sort of relief from the pain of my SPD. I was even enjoying feeling Dacina moving around.
So why am I bombarded with the pain of loss today? I miss them so much and I can't get over it even with a good crying out. I am questioning every decision I have made in my life. Why must I always be punished? Have I not paid my dues yet? When does it end? When can I just feel good without the torture of this pain?
Why do I feel I can't lean on Freddy right now? Will I trigger his pain by crying on his shoulder?
Why am I not the strong one today? I am supposed to be. I want to be. I need to be.